This recipe was boring me, so I decided to make it rhyme. Now you can make something tasty and enjoy a great work of literature.
Recipe
Ingredients and equipment
You’ll need a sturdy pine branch and some oil, around 200ml
A quater litre bottle, funnel, pan and very little skill.
Method
1. To sterilise your bottle you should wash it thoroughly
Bake it for ten minutes at one hundred degrees C.
2. Rinse and dry your pine needles to remove debris.
Pack them in the bottle and then heat the oil gently.
3. Wait until it bubbles and pour it on top of the pine
Seal and then refrigerate. Consume in three weeks’ time.

Ok enough with the rhyming. It’s 1am and I need to finish this post.
Top tips
The pine
Purists insist on using scots pine as it is the only variety native to the British aisles. I however support the free movement of all pines regardless of their nationality. There are 126 named species which as far as I can tell all taste exactly the same. Whichever species you go for pick the needles in early spring when they are soft and young. You should be able to smell the resinous alpine scent wafting gently from the branches.
The oil
Put that supermarket basics bottle back on the shelf. Put it back I tell you! We are trying to make a subtle, aromatic product here, not a bike chain lubricant. Try finding a mild, nutty extra virgin oil without too much of that peppery burn. You want something that allows the pine to shine.

A note on your imminent death
All of the forums I visited on Google seemed to suggest that just by looking at a bottle of infused oil I would surely perish of botulism. I was marginally concerned and did some research. Since 1989 there have been a total of 33 recorded cases of food-borne botulism in England and Wales, which makes death by serial killer or lawnmower far more likely. 1 in 1 people die and rest assured botulism is very unlikely to be the way you go.
It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.
― Marcus Aurelius
But just so I don’t get sued I will reiterate; sterlise your jars properly and use the oil within in 3 weeks.

Featured Image: Pine needles, scattered breezily around the chopping board